Wednesday, March 20, 2013

The Starlite Room - 3/20/13



Believe it or not dear readers, I do not like or enjoy giving a local establishment a bad review. Not at all. The whole point of the Burger Tour is to identify THE BEST Bar Burger in town, NOT the worst. Sure, it's inevitable that, as we look for our Prince, we're going to have to kiss a few frogs. I accept that. I welcome frog kissing. Some of my best friends are frogs. If two frogs love each other and want to get married, I support their decision as two rational, consenting adult frogs. Where was I? Oh yeah...our review.

THe Starlite Room


Please be sure to note the burger illustration, proudly depicted upon the establishment's signage along a heavily traveled thoroughfare utilized by a variety of motorized vehicles and pedestrians each and every day.
The Starlite Room has been on 1st Avenue NE for a long, long time! For YEARS their sign out front has proclaimed that they are the "Home of the Super Burger", whereas their menu proclaims them as the "Home of the Original Half-Pound Super Burger".


Photographic PROOF! Again, note the appearance of the illustrated, symmetrical burger, complete with  a "frilled sandwich pick", which loyal readers will know makes everything classier!
Well? Which is it? "Super Burger" or "Original Half-Pound Super Burger"? I feel so deceived, cheated, lied too....anyway....

I got to say....these days, proclaiming your business as the "home" of the 1/2 pound burger just isn't that big of a deal. Finding a half pound burger around this town is a pretty easy feat, whereas, I suppose, back in the day (HOW LONG IS IT???), The Starlite Room had a bout of marketing inspiration that made them a must stop establishment for local diners. "Well golly....a half pound of burger Ma! Can ya believe it? And on a bun too! Why, they even put a frilled sandwich pick into it! Hop on into the Jalopy, we's a goin' eatin' tonight!".

Half pound burgers live just about anywhere now, they're no longer ghettoized to only certain, selected northeast side watering holes and speakeasy's. "Home of the Original Half-Pound Super Burger"....please....gettin' so you can't swing a dead cat in this town and NOT come in contact with a half pound burger! 

Please don't swing cats. Alive OR dead. Thank you.

It would seem, over the years ,that Starlite's marketing has paid off, as year after year after year, various and sundry "surveys" and "opinion polls" and "votes" (Democracy...that's just a fad...it'll NEVER work....) have proclaimed the venerable old Starlite as "the best" in Cedar Rapids. And don't for a MOMENT think that the Starlite hasn't continued to cash in on this notoriety. In fact, as recently as 2012, Starlite was proclaimed as "THE BEST" in town by KCRG A-List Dining. It's true, check it out, I'll wait. 


Sadly friends, the Burger Tour cannot, WILL NOT support these same claims of greatness. A dozen of us journeyed there today, armed with our vast wealth of burger knowledge, to put the venerable old Starlite's claims to the test. What were the results? Sadly, they were frightening and more than a little disappointing. 

The Burger

As we all know, "the rules" of the Burger Tour strive to keep the experience as pure and consistent as possible from one establishment to the next. No fancy toppings or sauces, we want to rate the burgers in an unadulterated state. Starlite is PERFECT for that, as their Superburger was offered with cheese, lettuce, onion, pickle, ketchup and mustard. Classic. The way a regular burger is meant to be enjoyed. Twelve of us made the journey to the Starlite Room today and everyone filling out a survey ordered a burger, so no Bar Sammich's to contend with. Or salads.

Surveys have been completed, results tabulated, threats made, judges bribed and  the results are in. Starlite's burger has been rated as a 4.13/10. 



As presented. Note that there is no plate or other tableware to distract me from my burger.

The Superburger, unwrapped upon it's waxed paper "plate" and ready for consumption. Note the "symmetry" of the burger, as depicted earlier on the establishment's various marketing devices. Please also be aware of the "textured" bun, and the lack of a "frilled sandwich pick" which would be far too distracting and an unnecessary nuisance for "the best burger" of 2012. 

Now, don't just take my word for it! Comments from the group included:


  • Was okay, seemed more "packaged" than what I have had from before (long ago).
  • With the works. Burger presented well. I had to almost tear apart my sandwich in order to put ketchup and mustard on the bun. Overall a little dry for my liking. But overall a pretty good burger, good flavor and seasoned well.
  • Plain hamburger with ketchup and mustard with pickles. I didn't think it was the greatest. Not as greasy as the past times I've visited but still had plenty of it.
  • 1/4 cheeseburger w/everything. Tasted like it came off a 30 year old, never been cleaned, heavily grease coated gas grill. Yuck!
  • Not the best looking burger ever assembled, and tasted kind of dry and "mealy". Good, but not great flavor. Middle of the road at best
Fries & Sides

I can't speak for the rest of the country, but around these parts, one can often order what's known as a "burger basket". It's a plastic, reusable basket, lined with waxed paper, wherein a burger and fries are placed and served. A combo, if you will. A burger basket. Well...despite the burger NOT being served in a plate or a basket, the fries WERE served in a basket. Why not put the burger in the basket with the fries and serve it all at once? Just a suggestion. Fries and sides were given a 3.75/10. 

Comments:
  • I had onion rings which did not have a lot of flavor, but were warm and crisp
  • Fries, just kind of plain.
  • I like their Ranch to dip the fries in :)
  • Ordinary fries. MANY small fries in the basket, would have preferred longer fries, and not the scraps.
Service

Despite a lack of plates, I thought the service was OK. I ALWAYS try and give the service a bit of a break when the Burger Tour drops in unannounced, as we tend to make an impact in an establishment's normal course of business. That said, it looked like the Starlite was enjoying a fairly healthy lunchtime crowd, so our 12 people shouldn't have made too big of a dent in their capabilities. Group rated the service a 5.00/10. 

Comments: 
  • Wait staff was not very organized. Delivered the burgers first and then tried to match up the sides. I had to ask to get my onion rings and waitress was a little snotty. Pay the bill at the bar just by what you tell them you had-no bills were given to us.
  • The burgers were wrapped in paper and handed to us without a plate or silverware. Sides were in a basket-they could have combined the 2?? Not particularly fast.
  • Place was busy for lunch. And is actually a decent size. Thought it was odd not having silverware and the fact that they just wrapped the burger like its fast food.
  • I believe they could improve on the method of payment. Going to the register is pay is not timely.
  • Had to pay at the bar. $12.75 for lunch (burger, fries, soda). Fries and burger were NOT sold together, which made the burger appear cheaper, but ultimately, you pay the same as anywhere else.
Conclusion

Well, we didn't rate the Starlite real high. Someone, somewhere must love the place, because they keep winning local awards, and people were obviously there for lunch today. That said, there are MUCH better burgers to be found in Cedar Rapids. 

Would you eat here again, or recommend it to others? We scored Starlite a 2.50/5

Final Comments: 
  • Prices were good, food and service not so much. Atmosphere on the low end.
  • In the past this has always been the best hamburger place to go to. Now it has been more than 2 years since I've been there, so things may have changed. My guess, they stopped hand pressing the patties, went with frozen for consistency and cost, but they lost what made them great.
  • Overall I liked it.. Worthy of the BEST Burger award in Cedar Rapids...... I question #nosipnstir #bestyet
  • Could use a remodel.
  • I'll never understand why anyone would say that Starlight has "the best burger in town". I just don't get it.

1 comment:

  1. That's so sad, I love the Starlight. Though the dozen or so times I've been there I do have one or two bad experiences. Can't say much for the sides, but something tells me it must have just been an off day for the burgers.

    ReplyDelete